What To Do On a Date With a Man

What to do on the date

Look at you. Glowing. Ready for your date. FOCUS. Are you really ready? Do you know what to do on the date? If you answered yes to that question, then WHY ARE YOU READING THIS?? This is for the ladies that need a little advice on what to expect and what to do on a date. But if you know what you’re doing, you can read it too. You might learn something new.

So, here we are. I’m going to give you advice on what a date MIGHT entail. I say MIGHT because not all dates will be the same. Duhh. I shouldn’t even have to say that. I’ll tell you how a man MAY behave and what you can do to make the dating experience better for the BOTH of you.

Listen. First of all. I can hear your armpits sweating as you’re thinking, ‘What if he doesn’t like me? What if I do something stupid? What if I don’t like him?’ and blah blah blah. THERE ARE SO MANY WHAT IFs. So what? What if a meteor hits the restaurant? I pray to god it doesn’t, I care about you… and the others in the restaurant.

The point I’m trying to make is that we get so caught up on the ‘what ifs’ that we forget why we’re having the date in the first place. You want to have a good time and all you should be focusing on is that. Focus on how good you look NOT HOW GOOD HE THINKS YOU LOOK. Focus on being the best you.

Now, this doesn’t mean that be an asshole and do what you want, rather it means that when you are putting an effort to make the date good, people pick up on that effort and reciprocate.

Just pretend you’re on a night out with your girls, focus on the relaxation you feel when you do that. Now flirt with one of your girls. Except it’s not your girl. It’s your date.

I’m going to cover a few things in this topic.

I’m giving you a man’s perspective here, but it doesn’t mean that this applies to ALL men. But I’m sure if you incorporate atleast some, if not all, of these things on your date, you’ll get a proposal at the end. IM KIDDING, relax, you’re not that special. (You’re all special). So, the things I’ll be talking about are, your appreciation for his efforts/talking, your courteousness and the ending of the date.

But remember, you MIGHT get REJECTED and you may not know why. But it’s fine. You just met him. MOVE ON. Don’t ask why. Just keep it moving.

Appreciation of efforts/Talking

Us men LIKE to make an effort. Meaning, the ones who actually know what they’re doing, will compliment you, will open the door for you, will be a little flirty, will get to know you, will likely pay the bill, will listen to you, and will make the effort to make the date a good experience for you.

Often times, when men make these efforts, they don’t expect a thank you or something that shows appreciation and that’s fine. But I’m telling you this, if you show even a little appreciation, you will literally see the glow on his face. Like you might have to wear sunglasses.

BUT HOW DO YOU DO THIS? It’s very simple. A little thank you here and there, a little sentence saying, ‘You’re a very good listener, I like that’ or ‘I like your cologne’ or ‘I really appreciate you paying tonight, I had a great time’. Pretty much assure him that his efforts are working!!

When it comes to chatting, some guys get nervous. They may not be able to think quick enough to start a conversation. THAT’S ALRIGHT. Here, it can be often great for you to initiate it for him. It’ll put him at ease and he’ll become more comfortable. Trust me, us guys can talk for days if we’re comfortable. Shit, just look at us when we’re with the boys. Endless conversations. That’s the environment we crave! When we realize that you can give us that same environment, you’ll literally have to tell us to shut up. Please don’t, my heart… you’re so mean.

Flirt with him! Ladies, we looooovvveeee when you flirt. We find it very sexy. Plus, it gives us the go ahead to put some of our own moves on ya. Are you a parking ticket, because you’ve got fiiinnneee written all over ya. Alright that was bad but hopefully your date does it better.

INTENTIONS. Ladies, it’s very important to make these clear from the start! I always suggest to ask them what their intentions are! Read my blog on how to do this on a date.

Conversation is easy. We’re happy to talk about ourselves and we’re happy to listen to you. Just keep it natural. Show him you’re having fun and just go with the flow.

Courteousness

Please please please be courteous. This isn’t for your date but for yourself as well. Guys look for kindness in a woman. Be nice to the server, be kind to others. I shouldn’t even need to say anything here. When it comes to paying, offer to split, 99% OF THE MEN WILL NOT SPLIT. But hearing you say that goes a loooonnnnggg way.

I’m assuming that during your conversations, you’ve asked him what his intentions are with you. Now, I’ll tell you this, for guys that are looking for a long-term relationship, courteousness is a big thing. We know that we are going to make the efforts for you, like paying and whatnot, but we also look for a woman who’s willing to offer help. Even if we don’t need it. It feels great because first, it shows us that you recognize our effort and second, it shows us that you’re courteous enough to offer help because you want to do this together.

I know it seems like such a small thing to offer to split the bill but often times it gives us a bigger picture of things. This doesn’t mean that if you don’t offer to pay that he’ll see you as someone with no potential. It applies more to what you do rather than what you didn’t do. So, we won’t focus on the fact that you didn’t offer to split. We might not even give it a thought. But we will see it as a good thing when you do offer.

Ending of the date

Alright ladies, this is it. You made it. He didn’t go to the bathroom and hasn’t come back yet. He didn’t have a family emergency. He didn’t fake a seizure, it’s real, call an ambulance. IM KIDDING. So, you’ve dealt with the bill. You’re leaving the restaurant. Now what? YOU tell me. What do YOU want? There are a few different things here. You can either go your separate ways, either kiss and then go your separate ways, or either go home together, yes, I mean sex.

Now, there might be other things like having a drink at the bar or whatever, but that will also eventually end and lead to the three things I listed above. So, let’s talk about these shall we.

First, going your separate ways with no kiss. Ladies, this is very simple. If you don’t want a kiss or a hug, then simply say, ‘I had a great time, ill text ya, let me know when you get home, have a good night’ and leave. It’s quick, to the point and straightforward. Now, if you don’t want a kiss but you like him or you’re being nice and want to hug him then you can say all that to him as you make the move for a hug!

Now, some nervous guys will think you’re going for the kiss. Just look to your right or left as you go for the hug. There is no way the guy is going to try to wrap is head around to kiss you. My god, if he does, that is desperate. That’s it. Go your separate ways.

Alright, this is a big one for the guys. The kiss and then going your separate ways. Let’s be frank here, most of the time guys are expected to make the move. The big move. No, not proposal you crazy, the kiss. So, what I recommend is that YOU need to either initiate or communicate to the guy that you want a kiss.

Why? Because for guys, if they go for a kiss and the girl didn’t want one, then it is so fucking awkward. So, most guys will try to avoid the awkwardness by not doing it at all. BUT if let’s say DURING your date, you’re flirty and you maybe throw in a little compliment like, ‘I like your lips’ or something, you can atleast give him an indication that you might want a kiss.

Now, let’s say you didn’t do this during the date. Then it’s fine, you can just initiate. You can get close, put your arm on his arm and lean. There is no way, that any guy will not go for the kiss. That is like the most obvious you can be without actually kissing him. If he doesn’t get that hint, tell him to message me. He needs some advice. So, kiss him and then tell him how good of a night you had and then leave. That’s it. Simple.

Finally, let’s get to the sexy stuff. Yes, I mean sex. Ladies, you need to convey this DURING the date. Contrary to what people say, not ALL men are looking for sex after a date. Not ALL men will see it as a good sign. This doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. Some people are alright with having sex on a first date and some people aren’t.

But you need to somehow convey it because I always advise this, NEVER EXPECT ANYTHING. Just because YOU expect sex doesn’t mean the other person will ACCEPT it. HOW do you convey it DURING the date?? You can subtly bring it up. Ask him how he feels about sex on a first date. Communicate. Perhaps even ask him first what he’s looking for in terms of relationship. Gauge his reaction. I’ll say this, guys are very open to straightforwardness from a woman. If you aren’t comfortable with being straightforward then perhaps don’t bring it up during the date.

Instead, kiss him at the end of the date, if he’s alright with that, and then try to escalate by offering to go to his place or him to come back to yours. Something subtle like ‘Would you want to hang out some more at yours or mine?’. That way, it gives him a hint that you might possibly want to have sex and it gives him the option to tell you what he wants. Always, always communicate.

After your night is done and you’d like to talk to him more the next day. A great conversation starter is a follow up from last night. Something simple like, ‘Hey, I had a great night, hope you did as well’. Then wait for the reply. Normally this can lead to a good conversation and the possibility to bring up another date.

And that’s it. You have successfully had your date. I’m proud of you. Now you can start planning the wedding. I AM JOKING. Stop it. I know you’re looking at rings. Don’t do it.